The Dodgers are back from the dead (and it's all Magic's fault, more or less)


I mean, we’re over 100 games in to the season now and this team with one of the worst line-ups we’ve seen in this town since the slappy, no-hitting ass ’88 Doyers won the title on the back of some monster pitching and Kirk Gibson’s one-legged homer is still, by hook and crook, in a virtual tie for first place in the NL West. Look, I’m sure there’s some sort of sabermetric statt nerd explanation for what’s happening here, at least on the pitching side, but how the Dodgers have managed to stay in the playoff hunt without Matt Kemp for most of the season is quite the miracle.

If you follow the Dodgers, I’m not telling you anything you haven’t already suffered through with your own eyes. You know they’ve been beating some good teams with some serious punch & judy  lineups. Look at this big bag of stiffs that managed to beat Johnny Cueto and the reds last month. I mean, if you can stand the horror of it.

Tell me, who wouldn’t be terrified to face this Vegan meat-of-the-order, featuring Bobby Abreu, Juan Rivera, and Adam Kennedy in the 3, 4 and 5 spots? Looks alot more like some Former Angel greats touring softball team than a big league order and yet, the Dodgers soldier on.

Not like it’s a secret or whatever, but I’m the last guy who’ll ever be mistaken for a Dodger fan. Yeah, I’ve lived in LA my whole life, but for some reason I pretty much hated them from day one. Maybe it was Tom Lasorda, or Davey Lopes’ stupid mustache, or those horrible LAPD Dodger cards the cops used to drive around giving out way back when. The ones with those horrendous do-gooder speeches on the back.

Kids used to actually WALK INTO POLICE STATIONS and ask for these.


Shit, if only they had made an Officer Bird card, I might be a Dodger fan today.

Sadly, it doesn’t like I’ll have the Dodgers to beat on any longer, at least for the foreseeable future. What a shame that is. Yeah, I knew it was only a matter of time once they pried the team from Frank McCourt’s hands, but I had no idea the process would move as fast as it has. I was at an early May Giant/Dodger game and saw a full house of geeked up Dodger fans go crazy for the mere appearance of Magic Johnson on the mic to lead the 7th inning stretch and i knew shit was changing around here. The new ownership embraces the fans whereas the old ownership shat upon them from great heights.  The fans not only want to love the team desperately, they adore Magic to death in a few that LA fans have never adored anyone else, really. Truly, a deep, abiding love. How much of the team Magic actually owns is 100% irrelevant. What matters is that he is the literally the best guy on earth to be the public face of this team right now.

Now that the loose ends have been tied up, they are actually in shape to be players in the free-agent market. Now, you might be complaining about trading for Hanley Ramirez’ gelatinous contract, but taking on that kind of salary was a mere pipe dream a year ago and if nothing else, it shows that shit done changed in the front office. Better to die with your boots on, right? Between the new Television contract and the improving financial stability, the Dodgers are finally ready to be big money players in a sport that sports a wide gap between those who have and those who have not. So far, they opened up the vault for Matt Kemp and Andre Eithier, and I’m pretty sure when the time comes they’ll be throwing the kitchen sink at Clayon Kershaw as well. Baseball requires depth to win at the highest level, but having three or four superstars to build around ain’t gonna hurt anybody. Like I said, now that they can spend, this team will be getting better in a hurry.

Oh, and not like I’ve been writing it down or anything, but I’m pretty sure I’ve been yelling “no way the Dodgers finish .500 this year!” since about mid-May. This feels like as good a time as any to admit I might have been wrong about that one. Far as the rest of the year goes, they look like a decent bet to at least snag a wildcard birth and probably still have a 50/50 shot to win the West. That would be nice for the fans who stuck it out for the McCourt years, but it’s probably only the beginning.

Fuck me, the Dodgers are back.

Oh well. It was a fun two years.



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