THE LAKERS HAVE ONE WEEK TO FIX THIS MESS BEFORE I STARTING CALLING PEOPLE NAMES (SIGNING GUMMO JUST AIN'T GONNA CUT IT)

I am doing my best to be patient here.

Look, I understand that shit happens. A few weeks ago, the Lakers thought they had a deal for Chris Paul, only to be denied by David Stern and the Small market security squad. Tough break and all, but what kind of intelligent man goes into battle without a plan B? Still, I’m going do my best to wait until Christmas day to pass judgement on Jimmy Buss’ master plan, but so far it ain’t lookin’ too good.

For what it’s worth, I could get into why they haven’t moved on Dwight Howard when everyone knows it’s not only the move they need to make, but that they are in the drivers seat in terms of what they can offer, but I won’t. Shit, I could have a field day talking about trading Lamar Odom to Dallas (of all places) for essentially nothing but dammit, I made a promise to give ’em one more week.

Surely a less patient, less logical man than myself would be frothing at the mouth over the fact that the Lakers have done nothing whatsoever to address the dire point guard situation. What sane man could possibly be content to head into another season with Derek Fisher as the starter?

Don’t misunderstand me, I love the marketing potential of the STEREO WHITE BOY ATTACK (Josh McRoberts and Troy Murphy), but I feel like they might need just a bit more to get them back into title contention.

In the meantime, I’ll bask in the utter translucence of the Murph Dog and pray he’s gotten ahold of a time machine that can bring him back to his 2009 form.

Shit, almost forgot about the nickname. Henceforth, It will be my mission to get as many people calling him Gummo as I can.

Sorry, but the resemblance simply cannot be ignored.

-John Hathwell

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