The People’s Temple had themselves a baller.

Recognize the fellow on the left?  That’s right… Orlando Magic point guard, Jameer Nelson.

Just something I stumbled upon while doing a little research on Jonestown (just a typical night, basically).  Note the uncanny resemblance.  More than just a resemblance, in fact.

The timeline is a little loose.  The horrific events of the Jonestown massacre occurred in November of 1978.  Nelson was supposedly born in 1982.  All I ask is that you don’t believe everything that you read.  As we know, things get covered up and adjusted all the time.

In this case, the prevailing conspiracy theory centers around the CIA’s MK-ULTRA mind control program somehow having a role in the mass suicides that took place.  Take a look at the photo above and tell me those aren’t the eyes of an unconscious man.  Or how about the photo below, in which it is clear that Nelson has no idea where he’s at:

Or how about this one, exhibiting all the signs of a delusional individual:

Or this:


Fortunately, of course, Nelson survived Guyana and apparently picked up some “skills” along the way.  That can be attributed to his tireless work ethic, and the coaching of Jim Jones:

(“… and next year… WE’RE GONNA WIN IT AGAIN.”)

Obviously, Jones was the inspiration for Pat Riley, both in terms of look as well as philosophy.  “GET EVERYONE TOGETHER.  WORK TOGETHER.  A TEAM.”  Additionally, the Reverend supposedly had a crossover that could break the ankles of even the most defensively savvy of his followers/players.

In any event, Nelson built the foundation for what would be a solid NBA career.  His best decisions while playing under Jones, in terms of development, were:

1) Drilling fundamentals on a daily basis,
2) A tenacious dedication to conditioning, and
3) Choosing to drink water over Flavor Aid during breaks of team practices.

It pretty much explains how Jameer has been able to not only tolerate but actually praise personalities like those of Stan Van Gundy and Dwight Howard.  Those dudes are a walk in the park compared to his former coach.

Finally, I’m convinced that Nelson isn’t the only Magic player to emerge from the darkness that was Jonestown.  See, there’s this guy:

There might finally be a legitimate excuse for Hedo after all.

Just a little something to snack on during this fucking lockout.  And, yes, this is much worse than the time I compared Caron Butler to the Nightstalker, Richard Ramirez.

(Hey, there is now a part 2 to this unbelievable saga. check it out here.)

– Wes Lilliman can be contacted at twitter.com/WesDestiny.  However, in this case, don’t bother – I know.



  1. THAT'S RIGHT. I completely forgot about that. Not only that, but I just found photos of the JONESTOWN BASKETBALL COURT. I have to do a follow-up on this (unbelievable) – all credit to COURT OF APPEALS.

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